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ISSUE 26

SUMMER 2015

CONTENTS

 

EDITORIAL - Ken Clay

ALTERNATIVE SUMMER – Eric A. Buckley

CHAPS IN CHAPEL – Alexis Lykiard

ESSEX BOY (2) – Ivan de Nemethy

BACK IN THE SIXTIES – Alan Dent

FOREIGN CLIMES – Tom Kilcourse

F.B. EYES – Jim Burns

A MODEST PROPOSAL – Keith Howden

LORD CLARK – Ron Horsefield

A CERTAIN FEELING FOR WORDS – David Birtwistle

BERGMAN’S SHAME – Ron Horsefield

A TURD CALLED OPPORTUNITY – Tanner

LOST ORISONS Keith Howden         

LINE DRAWING & THIEVES  –Ross Wilson

NO TIPPING ALLOWED – Eric Smith

SUITCASE BY THE DOOR - Andrew Lee-Hart

WHITE VAN – Mark Ward

ON OIK PHILOSOPHY – Ron Horsefield

ON THE BUSES – Bob Wild

ART CRITICISM – Ron Horsefield

FROM PRAGUE WITH LOVE – George Aitch

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EDITORIAL

RESCUED FROM OBLIVION 

For starters this occurred to me as a title for The Crazy Oik but it seemed a bit portentous. And the mission statement about shining a light into literature’s basement was, on reflection, also a bit of an insult to our established writers who have long been clear of such anonymous obscurity. Two of the buggers have Wiki pages for Chrissakes. “Oik” had comic overtones (for an extended etymology of this word see the website) which “proletarian” didn’t. Indeed that echt-prole novelist Alan Sillitoe bridled at the tag “proletarian writer” saying that there was no such thing – there were only writers, good and bad. Yes, up to a point Alan but there is (or maybe was) a region of experience untouched before the arrival of Alan Sillitoe, Philip Callow and Stan Barstow et al which the Oik hoped to explore. “Crazy” was a warning that we might prefer having a larf to triggering off the next revolution or attending to the moral education of our readers.  

But to rescue from oblivion is a worthy aspiration and just what small mags should do. Yes, there’s the internet and Facebook and twitter and all that other ephemeral shite but they’re merely annexes to oblivion. There’s nowt like a printed book. It could be still around in 500 years time and not need a battery, a power supply an operating system, an ebook reader or the cloud. Imagine a world where only these gadgets existed and somebody invented the book – they’d be queuing round the block for it.

So exactly what’s been rescued up to now? We include in this project our parallel production Penniless Press Publications which we frequently plunder (what a lot of ps). The ongoing essays of Jim Burns is currently up to vol 5 with vol 6 in progress. Keith Howden’s hilarious Gospels of Saint Belgrano (we put one in every issue) languished in a drawer for twenty years along with several fine poetry collections and four novels. Ivan de Nemethy’s autobiog, Dave Birtwistle’s quirky sagas, Tom Kilcourse’s tales and biography, S. Kadison’s inspection of the way we live now and why we shouldn’t, Tanner’s excoriating accounts of life in Liverpool’s lower depths (these would never get into Country Life but Tanner’s working to make himself more acceptable by moving to Swindon). 

Then there’s the exotics – writers from India, Israel, Syria, Greece, Russia, The Czech Republic, Hungary, and USA have appeared in these pages. We could have called it Interesting Stuff Which You Are Unlikely to Find Anywhere Else in the Currently Corrupt World of Mainstream Publishing Concerned Only With Making a Buck. Rescued From Oblivion is better but we’re sticking with The Crazy Oik.

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KEITH HOWDEN
LOST ORISONS

1.  Je ne regret rien

Je ne regret rien  -  he used to play it
often, lonely reveilles at Piaff’s
impassioned, stiletto summons
to the heart’s dispossessed. I pin him
clearly now, effete, nearly dignified,
moth at the window of that villa
- his father’s house, he never moved or married  -
courting decay. Neglected cacti
haunt the pane-splintered greenhouse 
where he stares to lost horizons
of fret or winter seascapes. War -
its casual disposition of life’s fullness -
had seared his mind.
                                  He wore the shame
of a slack matron, one of the destitute, 
avid for chocolate, who shuffled
naked to handclaps on a NAAFI table, 
mouthing obscenities and  cheapjack
coquetries she didn’t comprehend,
in parrot words taught her by soldiers
for ribald entertainment. 
                                       There was a girl,
 not far from Vienna, after the war 
 - some camp for the displaced -
who smacked  his proffered flowers in his face.
I pin him effeminate, butterfly faded,
his face towards some seaward window,
his potted cacti withering Golgotha, 
 the black disc flickering whirlpool
 in an expensive console, Piaff’s
 plangent,  imperious summons
 to the heart’s dispossessed.
Abstract Form - David Carr